From New Lines Magazine.
Why one Syrian woman says her recent visit to her hometown, after more than a decade away, may be her last
For the last seven years, I have had a refugee travel document that states “Valid for travel to all countries except Syria.” But three months ago, I received citizenship status in Britain, allowing me to apply for a passport with no such restrictions. A friend asked me at the time whether I would ever go back to Syria, and my answer was an instant and clear “No.” After all, I would be in danger. Yet just days after receiving my new British passport, just weeks after Bashar al-Assad fled the country, I found myself on my way there.
My feelings were mixed as I planned for my return after almost a decade in exile. I was scared of having to deal with feelings of alienation, which I had experienced before I left because of Islamist rule in what used to be rebel-held areas, including my own city of Idlib. I knew that most of the people I lived with there had left, too, and I knew that many foreign jihadists had moved into the town instead. Still, something in me was hopeful about my return, and I had heard that the strict interpretation of Sharia that had been implemented had been relaxed. But I was mistaken in my hope.
Damascus is dusty and dirty. The smell of the thick smoke of unrefined oil suffocates. It feels like a yellowish tint has been applied to your eyes in the morning, and at night, darkness takes over, as there is only electricity for two to three hours a day, leaving the streetlights dark. Even in Shaalan Souk, the central market that is considered higher class than other areas, people must use their phones’ flashlights to walk at night. Piles of rubbish occupy all the streets, even the highways. There are no road rules: It sometimes feels as if all pedestrians, drivers and cyclists are suicidal.
But one thing on the streets has changed dramatically: the absence of sexual harassment. This change felt alien to me. Throughout my life in Syria, sexual harassment, both verbal and physical, had been ever-present: Whenever and wherever women and girls were in public, harassment was there alongside them. Women shared plenty of darkly hilarious stories during their gatherings, while drinking tea and eating sunflower seeds. In fact, it was a brilliant, if unintended, feminist activity, building solidarity among us.
Now it is markedly different. I asked all the women I met, and they confirmed that street harassment has been dramatically reduced since the fall of the regime. They attributed this to videos of Hayat Tahrir al-Sham (HTS) fighters pulling the mustache of a sexual harasser publicly and forcing another to walk around humiliated, chanting “I have sexually harassed a girl” — videos which were shared widely back in December. “I am against the violations committed against the men, but frankly, it worked!” Nada, a recently graduated journalist, told me.